Hell yeah! That's pretty much the feeling the average person will have throughout this compact and action-filled piece of garbage. It's an incredibly crazy, riveting and somewhat moronic 75 minutes, it's the kind of project that defines what B-list horror should be all about. The hilarious (in a sadistic way) opening immediately drags you in, and the movie just utterly refuses to let you go after that. Demonic zombie nuns, fluorescent(!) blood, hot chicks, washed-up gangsta rapper Coolio playing a cop, I thank God for showing me all this pure uncut greatness. If all this stuff can't get your attention, I really don't know what will. The Adrienne Barbeau appearance is just icing on the cake, brilliant role. Of course this movie isn't particularly well-made or well-written, but I stopped caring roughly ten seconds in. Loads of fun.
The Convent (2000) 1080p YIFY Movie
The Convent (2000) 1080p
The Convent is a movie starring Joanna Canton, Richard Trapp, and Dax Miller. A group of college students break into an abandoned convent and become possessed by demonic spirits.
IMDB: 5.10 Likes
The Synopsis for The Convent (2000) 1080p
A group of college students break into an abandoned convent and become possessed by demonic spirits.
The Director and Players for The Convent (2000) 1080p
The Reviews for The Convent (2000) 1080p
Bargain bin masterpieceReviewed bySandcoolerVote: 7/10
In fact, these young people were so distasteful that I couldn't wait for all of 'em to get slaughtered, and that includes Clarissa (Joanna Canton) since I considered her the most annoying of the bunch.
But I knew it was gonna be a mess from the opening minutes when a teen Christine opened fired on the priest and the nuns with the Leslie Gore music playing in the background. It had nowhere to go but down.
Even the prosthetics looked fake and the "blood" looked suspiciously like Hawaiian Punch, although later on it took on red day-glo look to match the silly halloween makeup they were all wearing. I'm sure all the GOTH morons out there will appreciate this bullsh-t since it'll appeal to that bunch. It sure didn't appeal to me. Blah...
And not even my favorite horror babe Adrienne Barbeau can save this stupid teen horror flick from itself. She still looks hot, though. I'm glad she takes care of herself since we don't get to see too much of her nowadays.
However, it is a step up from Dante Tomaselli's meandering HORROR (2002) in that it has a somewhat coherent plot, so I'll give it that much. That and the little Boston terrier named Boozer also brings it up a notch. I like what Boozer does to Clarissa in the end. It was the only good scene in an otherwise silly film.
Lion's Gate Films sure must have been desperate when they picked this one up.
2 out of 10
A group of college students (cheerleader, goth, stoner, jock, virgin) decide to visit the old convent that was shut down due to a nasty incident that occurred. The goth chick, Mo, is captured by wannabe devil worshipers and they unwittingly unleash demons. As demons take over the bodies of nice girl Clorissa's boyfriend and friends, only Adult Christine (played awesomely well by Adrienne Barbeau) can stop them.
The opening scene sums up what is to follow. A beautiful babe in a school girl outfit and leather jacket with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth slaughters nuns and priests with a baseball bat, shotgun, and matches while "You Don't Own Me" plays. If you like this sequence, you will like the rest. Nuttiness ensues involving drugs, virgin sacrifices, forced abortions, gay Satanists, ditzy cheerleaders, and a pugnacious pug. Oh, and Coolio and Bill Moseley make appearances as no-good coppers.
It should be noted that this is one of the earlier works from The Gravedancers director, Mike Mendez and won the Audience Award at Fantafestival.
I have to say that my favorite scene (other than the opening) was set to the song "Dreamweaver" where stoner Biff gets high off shrooms and weed, hears Jesus talking to him, and tries unsuccessfully to mate with a demon.
There were incredibly likable characters you watched run around. Goth chick Mo (also in The Gravedancers) is adorable, Stoner dude Biff was hilarious, and Young/ Adult Christine oozed coolness. Unfortunately, none of these great characters get more than a half hour screen time. Instead, we are stuck with the good girl Clorissa.
As for the religious undertones, or in this case, way overtones, it is not preachy or sacrilegious. Mendez comes across as showing what is scary about the idea of having to conform within the confines of a convent.
I saw that the SFX received bad comments in other reviews, but I felt was okay overall. The make-up was a tad silly in some parts like glow in the dark veins and neon blood. However, the prosthetics used to raise the demons foreheads looked realistic and the "blood shower" scene was cool. The "Antichrist birth" scene was especially good considering this was low budget and it was only on screen for about one minute.
Favorite Quote: Satanist asks, "Are you the spawn of the Devil?" Nerd replies, "No, I'm a Lambda."? Or when Clorissa says, "My brother's going to be the next Antichrist? Mom's gonna be pi*ssed." DVD Extras: Audio Options (inc. Spanish Subtitles), Commentary, Behind the Scenes, 1 Deleted short Scene, and "Gore on Demand" which showed the death scenes up close and in slow motion.
Bottom Line: A very goofy, fun film with lots of gore. Reminiscent of Night of the Demons or The Evil Dead.
Molly Celaschi www.HorrorYearbook.com MySpace.com/HorrorYearbook